Archive for June, 2005

Pic Of The Week

June 30, 2005
Picture of the Week

Full Force
What if muscle-bound rappers like 50 and LL Cool J walked around dressed like this nowdays?
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Certified Gangsta.

June 30, 2005

New Line Cinema has bought comedy pitch Teacher of the Year from writer Jeff Bushell with an eye for Ice Cube to star in the tale of two junior high school instructors in a brutal competition to take teacher of the year honors.Variety says that once a finished draft comes in, Cube will likely attach himself to the project if everyone involved wants to move forward. Bushell worked on Curious George for Universal and is penning South of the Border for Disney. Cube was last seen in Are We There Yet? and XXX: State of the Union.
In other hip hop news . . .
The Game, who famously feuded with mentor 50 Cent back in March, is now locked in a hate-fest with thuggish rap mogul Suge Knight. The pair’s respective posses rumbled outside marketing maestro Steve Stoute’s 35th birthday bash at Cabana in L.A. Sunday night after one of Knight’s cronies tried to snatch a bling-encrusted chain off Game’s neck. The next night, Knight and Game were disinvited from a party for R&B diva Ciara at Geisha House — and security was doubled — after it was rumored the rap rivals would square off again there. Insiders believe it’s only a matter of time before the festering feud explodes into violence. Knight, who has aligned himself with the Bloods street gang for years, has long been suspected of involvement in the unsolved murder of Brooklyn rap legend Notorious B.I.G. The slain rapper’s family recently filed a federal lawsuit claiming the LAPD turned a blind eye to the 1997 murder because evidence pointed at disgraced cop David Mack, who allegedly worked for Knight’s Death Row Records.

Young Jeezy looks like an overweight Game.
And Game looks like Mr. Potato Head.
Music to get robbed to. (Via Notes From A Different Kitchen)

There’s not much going on in the world of negrotainment today.I’m still trying to recover from the coon convention so bare with me. But I am elated to say that the big day is finally here! After weeks of patiently waiting When Crackheads Attack Being Bobby Brown debuts tonight. NBC re-aried the interview with Bobby and Matt Lauer this morning so you know I had to watch it again. What’s up with Bobby’s “stroke mouth” as Jon calls it?

Recap

June 29, 2005

National Coon Convention Recap Notes


– As soon as The Fugees hit the stage I an automatic smile spread across my face. I was happy to see that they had worked whatever differences it is that they were having with each other out. They went on to perform a melody of songs in which Lauryn Hill did not sound like herself at all. Its bad enough she was on stage looking like a black pilgrim but her voice wasn’t the same at all to me. I even heard of say that “maybe we got a little overzealous at rehearsals” while they were performing. She also did do a good job of scooping up an earring which flew off in the middle of a routine so all wasn’t lost.

– Upon their arrival on stage Will and Jada gave a nod to the movie Coming To America which was very cute to me. The wheels on the carriage had spinners, the flower girls tossed money, and they looked impecable. It’s just too bad that their hosting capabilities weren’t that hot. Yeah, they didn’t suck completely but it’s not like they did a lot of presenting either. Their presence was not that of Mo’Nique or Steve Harvey and Cedric the Entertainer. You can’t fuck up what you didn’t do so they passed the exam, just barely though. And what was up with Will keeping his white suit on for what seemed like forever while Jada had at least two wardrobe changes? I was happy when the brother finally decided to take that shit off . . .

– During the course of the evening BET had a few fuck ups one including not having the presenters walk out on stage with the envelope containing the winner’s name in it. Some negro would have to shuffle his ass across the stage from the back and hand it to the presenters. Hated it! Another thing I didn’t dig at all and I thought was just so tacky was the use of the very top of the stage as a revolving billboard. When I first saw Nick Cannon’s new movie I was like “Okay, maybe he’s about to come out or something” and then they cut to commercial. Next thing I knew, Fat Joe’s ass was up there for All or Nothing. I finally figured it out though; they probably paid BET for advertising their projects. And you know us niggas ain’t gonna turn no money down! (Yes I realize how many grammatical errors the proceeding sentence had but there was no other way to explain.)

– As I stated before, the performances were lackluster in my opinion. I switched back and fourth from the award show to the draft during those moments.

– The Game put me to sleep early on with his stage presence. I actually booed at the screen while he stood up there mumbling the lyrics to “Dream”. In the middle of “Hate It or Love It” when his center stage prop lifted up and revealed Mary J. Blige I was so excited. Mary has been my shero for years but um, what was up with her hair. Either way she killed it in my opinion and scared little Harlem at the same time. Game owes Mary for having her save his ass.

– Missy Elliott is one of the most innovative people in entertainment so he shows usually mirror that sentiment. The video for “Lose Control” is one of my current favorites for the sole fact that there is so much taking place. I also love to see her and the dancers get down. This performance was alright I guess. Nothing special. Ciara also came out on stage and did her thing. I still think she might very well be a man but hey, as long as Bow Wow likes it.

– I’ve never been apart of the whole John Legend movement so I switched to the draft as he sung “Ordinary People”. By the time I did change my channel back Stevie Wonder had picked up and was singing. I know I’m going to hell for this but Stevie’s mouth looks ridiculous. He has what I like to call “pube mouth”. A syndrome where the facial hair resembles pubic hair. Anthony Hamilton also suffers from this affliction. Any who, I love Stevie regardless so the duo was nice.

– Beyonce ‘nem gave out free lap dances to Nelly, Magic Johnson, and Terrance Howard. I’m not going to go into detail because I’m a chick and I would have rather had some sexy, oiled down man give me one so there. All I gotta say is my best friend and I noticed that Michelle’s heels wasn’t as high as Kelly’s and Beyonce’s. Hmm, I wonder why . . .

– T.I. was boring. I went to the bathroom while he was on stage.

– I personally loved the energy behind the gospel performance. Now my black ass can’t tell you who the hell it was up there, but it was crunk. I was just disappointed to see that the audience wasn’t that into it. They can stand up and cheer for some bullshit and not the Lord. Damn shame. Fantasia looked ghetto as usual. I also noticed that during this performance these negros at BET decided to have the promotional ad for Webbie at the top of the stage. You know, the nigga that raps the girl gimme that pussy song. That’s just sad.

– The cast from Fresh Prince of Bel Air decided to show up. Who the fuck cares? We see ya’ll everyday on Nick At Nite. Plus, the original Aunt Vi wasn’t apart (or little Nicky) so ya’ll could’ve stayed wherever ya’ll was at. Plus, why did the second Aunt Vi have on that tight ass dress? Can you say girdle?

– Mariah Carey had the worst backdrop in my opinion because it looked like my senior prom decorations. A night in paradise to remember and shit. Anyways, she also looked like she was afraid to walk out on that dock and I don’t blame her. That shit looked faulty as hell. She also gave the appearance of another break down at the end of the set so I was relieved when she got her ass off stage.

– Omarion gave a sneak preview for You Got Served 2. If you look close enough you could also see that at the end of his routine that he never made it back under the stage. He and that chick were just positioned all fucked up while the props closed in front of him. Boooo!

– Thank Jesus for Gladys! Gladys showed all of those rookies how the shit was supposed to be done after Faith Evans and Toni Braxton got their asses off the stage. Is it me or did Toni wear that dress a few years ago to the Grammy’s? And Faith looks funny now. Anyways, Gladys was the shit. My favorite performance of the night!

– Tributes to Johhnie Cochran, Ossie Davis, Ol Dirty Bastard, and Rick James was given throughout the course of the evening. The tributes to Johnny Cochran and Ossie Davis were eloquent and well spoken. But black folks can’t ever get it right, enters Wu Tang Clan. This wasn’t the whole clan of course. I didn’t remember seeing Method Man or U God on stage but it was a pretty nice representation. As they camera angle changed and a picture of Ol Dirty was shown I wondered why in the hell they didn’t pick a better picture than that. It finally struck me that it wasn’t like Ol Dirty had a lot of them to choose from.

Teena Marie looking a hot, steaming mess as usual, gave a heart warming tribute to Rick James. If you remember, last year’s award show was the last time we saw Rick perform along with Teena. I thought Teena was at Def Poetry for a quick second there when she started getting into it. Still beautiful words nevertheless. But yo, why did the audience give Rick a standing ovation and no one else. Once again, ya’ll niggas can stand up for Rick James and not Ossie, Johnnie (who helped some of ya’ll criminal asses out), or God?

– Bob Johnson, no one cares about what you have to say. And DAMN Michael Jordan looked crispy as hell last night while I’m thinking about it.

– Mike Jones performed ya’ll. BET must have been pretty strung out. But his performance was the funniest of them all I swear. Okay, you know rappers like to toss cash into the audience like its nothing? One of Mike’s weed carriers decided to say “fuck that son!” and proceeded to pick up the loose bank.

– Stevie Wonder is the shit! Good ol pube mouth danced along side Fatima Robinson and some other chica becoming my second favorite performance of the night.

– Ciara was the last performance. It was boring, I changed the channel.

So that’s my commentary on the Coon Convention last night. Hopefully I didn’t bore you too badly.

Quick Photo Op
Hey you guys, the gang’s here! And don’t they look so happy together?
Pauletta looks crazy as hell.
What does Teena Marie and Remy Ma have in common?
What happened to Chingy’s forehead?
Black women, we got to do better.
Another glimpse at Stevie’s pube mouth.
B-list celebs were also in the building.

Superhead Tells All

June 29, 2005

Some of you may have heard the name “Superhead” tossed up in interviews and commentary from some of your rap favs but never knew exactly who she was. I myself did not know until last year when I read an article in Vibe about the former hip hop eye candy. So basically she (Karrine Steffans) has penned a book titled Confessions of a Video Vixen about her romps with different men in the entertainment business.

Here’s some juicy tidbits for ya.

Shaquille O’Neal “was charmingly self-effacing about his sexual prowess and wanted to reduce my expectations,” she writes. But “compared to other men,” she assures readers, “he was nothing to complain about.” She says that Shaq was so impressed with Steffans that, the day after meeting her, he deposited $10,000 into her bank account.

A small part in “A Man Apart” allowed Steffans to discover that starVin Diesel was “a beautiful man … blessed with an enviable eight-pack and an even more enviable [bleep].”

After hearing so much about Fred Durst’s stature, she gushed, “to actually hold him … felt like a privilege.”Sex with “insatiable” producer Irv Gotti “became more like a boxing match.” During their affair, Steffans claims, Gotti lent her to his friends as he saw fit.

After inviting her to his home at 4 a.m., Sean (P. Diddy) Combs kicked his manservant Fonzworth Bentley out of a guest bedroom so he and Steffans could spend 15 minutes making love. “You’re one of the best,” she says P. Diddy told her. Steffans writes: “I said the same to him, when, in actuality, he was average.” Ouch.

Steffans says she got around to Whitney Houston’s husband, Bobby Brown, in late 2002. Steffans says she never saw him do drugs. But she worried for his mental health during a frantic encounter where “he told me he was a member of Al Qaeda and that President Bush was looking for him.”She made Ja Rule promise to “always come back.” But after he slipped out one morning before she woke up, “I looked around for something to take with me, something that would smell like him but wouldn’t be missed. On the floor I found a balled-up sock, and I placed it to my face and got the fix I was searching for.” Sniff.

Steffans also tells the whole story of her back-of-the-limo tryst with Usher.

None of the stars’ reps we called yesterday responded by deadline. Their handlers can at least take comfort in knowing that, after years of self-destructive star-chasing, Steffans now says, “I am my own woman and look for no one to complete me.”
(Source: NY Daily News)

I don’t knock her hustle for releasing a book which probably explains in great details what took place in the past. As much as rappers capitalize on their video hoes, they should be able to do the same. Do you. But what the fuck is up with the whole Ja Rule sock thing. Like my Auntie always said, “No man’s dick is made out of gold”. I’ve been pretty love struck myself and has never had the urge to pick up any of my man’s article of clothing and sniff the shit. And we all knew Bobby Brown was a terrorist for years.

Follow Up Post

June 29, 2005

Megan Good’s face expresses the taste those niggas left in my mouth last night. The BET Awards were so horrendous I’m not going to even dedicate a full post to it. I’ll do one later with some additional pictures from the show / red carpet.

For those who did not catch it last night I’m not being mellow dramatic. It just was just that bad. I’ve watched better Source Awards shows than this!

Feel free to comment on the catastrophe known as the National Coon Convention.

Photo Op

June 28, 2005
One Stop Photo Op !

wtf

You muthafucka.


– Holy shit Batman, Timbaland lost a lot of weight!

– Bobby Brown is not high for once . . .

– Whitney feeling good . . .

– Bobbi Christina looking, well, interesting . . .

– Janet and Bubbles, opps, I meant Jermaine . . .

– Ciara and Bow Wow getting their puppy lust love on . . .

– Ciara looks like she’s posing for her web cam for her Black Planet page . . .

– Somebody’s trying to get their hood pass back . . .

– Eveyone’s favortie drunk cousins from Georgia the YoungBloodz . . .

– And you of all people had the nerve to call that white woman an has been . . .

National Coon Convention

June 28, 2005
National Coon Convention Airs Tonight!

If didn’t know and have been living under a rock for the past couple of weeks, the BET awards air tonight. As much as I have screwed with this channel in the past I will be tuning in like the good jig that I am. The award show is supposedly going to pull out all of the big stops this year to make it bigger and better than last year’s. Yeah right! I think its going to be a while until someone can live up to the Rick James standard that was set by him last year. You never know though as it could happen tonight.

BET just needs to stop dropping damn hints about the performances. I know they’re excited and all but Jeevus. I generally like to watch award shows soley for that reason since I can’t go to a concert every two weeks like some people who will remain nameless, heh. So this is kinda my way to get that fix and do it for free. I’m also excited to see how Will and Jada control the show with their hosting capabilities tonight. They’re a cute couple to me, sorta like a modern Ossie Davis (RIP) and Ruby Dee. They glow whenever they’re around each other. It’s beautiful. Okay, enough of that.

In Will Smith related news, MTV thinks that Nick Cannon is hilarious. He’s getting his own show.

Lastly I would like to say greetings and you-need-to-reply-to-my-second-email to Rod from Rod Online. 80 percent of you are coming from over that way so I must say hello to you all. I’m an overnight celebrity now. I love the fact that Rod said my site “had flava” that other pop culture sites were missing. That’s right baby, I got some hot sauce for that ass! Ha! My whole aim is to bring pop culture (or negrotainment as I sometimes reference to it) to the forefront. When I go to different sites I don’t see myself represented there. The content and extra frills that would excitement are almost always absent. What about me? You all have been dismissed from the blogroll. Thanks in advance!

PSA

June 27, 2005

Public Service Announcement

White people in Florida please stay the hell out of shark infested water. I’m tired of hearing about Jaws attacking your dumb asses every two days on the local news. Thank you.

Um No?

June 27, 2005
*Sigh*

Poll: Women Want Jessica Simpson’s Hair

NEW YORK (AP) – You want Jessica Simpson’s hair, admit it. According to a new poll conducted by In Touch magazine, the singer and “Dukes of Hazzard” star has the hairstyle most women want. Simpson won out over former “Friends” star Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Alba of “Sin City” and “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” actress Angelina Jolie, who placed second, third and fourth, respectively. The rest of the Top 10 vote-getters were, in order: desperate housewife Eva Longoria; another desperate housewife, Marcia Cross; Paris Hilton’s one-time pal Nicole Richie; Mischa Barton of “The O.C.”; Oprah Winfrey; and Gwyneth Paltrow.

Excuse me? I don’t want to have hair like Oprah because thats not her hair. Come on, I know a half wig when I see one. Sometimes she doesn’t even take the time out to blend her real hair into it. Just look at it. All the money in the world and her ass still buying Shake N Go wigs. Bitch please, list some names I can relate to. For instance, I love Jill Scott’s hair, wouldn’t mind calling it my own. Everytime I see Nikki’s profile (I hope she doesn’t mind me referencing her) it reminds me of when my mother had a similar style that looks beautiful to me. And Jada’s hair always looks nice. But Oprah? OPRAH?! I think not. I know some of you are probably like “But you were just bitching about Hermes not allowing her into their store because of her hair” but fuck that, she can do better. That situation is another issue because thats on them. She was just out doing her so whatever. Now what I’m speaking on is why she can’t seem to take a few extra seconds to hook the front of her hair line up. Let Dark and Lovely hit those naps girl, please.

And I’m not even going to go there with Nicole Richie.

Must See TV

June 27, 2005
popcorn
Last night was an excellent night for television in my opinion. I was entertained all night long by various highs and lows. Let’s speak on the highs first.
Bobby’s Brown Interview On Dateline

Although I did not catch the interview in its complete entirety it still proved it’s self to be comical. I believe the whole basis for Bobby giving the interview to Matt Lauer was to promote the new show which will be premiering on Thursday night at 10pm on Bravo. Yes I’m beating that time slot into your head because I don’t want you to forget. But at any rate, I was amused by the different clips from the show Dateline aired. My overall favorite one would have to be Bobby breaking into his hotel’s room stocked bar that he did not pay for obviously. Hmmm, and the runner up clip would have to be Mr. Prerogative doing the any-many-miny-mo number to decide if he would drink a glass of water or guzzle down a Budweiser first. Bud won by the way. I’ll add a few screenshots of the interview later since I don’t feel like messing in photoshop right now.
The Boy Whose Skin Fell Off
Believe it or not, the fresh one yearned to be a forensic scientist back in the day. Yes that’s right; call me a freak if you please by my whole reasoning was solid: people die everyday thus I will never be out of a job. I tell you all of this because TLC has been a staple in my viewing for years now. If you can get pass all of the shitty decorating and makeover shows, their reality line up is pretty dang solid. The Boy Whose Skin Fell Off is the documentary of a 36 year old man named Jonny Kennedy who was born with a genetic disorder where his skin literally fell off with the slightest touch, leaving very painful sores covered all over his body and also leading to his fight with terminal skin cancer.
It was very touching and uplifting to watch him give his outlook on life. The documentary really struck a place in my mind and heart as he discussed his final days on earth. This did not keep Jonny’s sense of humor absent however. The show was full of poignant jokes and by the end of the show you felt as if you lost a member of your family. I’m a big softy when it comes to topics such as this so yes I did cry at the end when he passed.

Intervention
Any time I can see white people being portrayed as drug addicts I’m all for it. On the serious tip this is also one of my new favorites to watch. It’s a documentary series that follows the lives of addicts, taking an unflinching look at the impact of their addictions on their everyday lives, all the while the addicts are unaware that an intervention is being planned. Each airing ends with the friends, family and a professional interventionist urging the addict to get treatment. If the individual should choose treatment, the addict immediately enters a widely respected treatment facility. This show is my anti drug!

The Andy Molakis Show
The first time I was introduced to this chunky white boy I thought he was too funny for words. I can remember sitting in the dorm with all of my homeslices watching his video clips over and over again. If you like silly, goofy shit than this show is for you (think Napoleon Dynamite). There is some what of a hip hop influence on the show also with the music and guests to come. Lil Jon and the Eastside Boys made a cameo on the debut episode last night that was just so-fa-king-we-tall-did. Lil Jon was eating Frutie Peebles out of his pimp cup, ha.

And now the lows . . .

Punk’d
Punk’d was alright for what its worth but the reason why I am categorizing it as a low is because everyone and their mama now has something to say about Raven Symone’s weight today, myself included. In my opinion Raven looks great. People really need to stop tripping so much and realize that she is not little Olivia anymore. Get the fuck over it! The girl is like 19 years old, hell maybe even 20 now, and people are still expecting her to be looking the way she did on Hangin’ With Mr. Cooper. Give me a break! I only wish that people could be placed under the same microscope as these celebs for one week. They would crack under the pressure because I know I would. Now if Raven was walking around looking all cracked the fuck out like Nicole Richie and Lindsay Lohan people would think she was on drugs. Since she looks healthy and alive people think she’s huge. Fuck off. So to all the negative folks out there I say this, have you looked in the mirror lately?
Pimp My Ride
This trick had a live rat in her car, just trifling.