You Sent It // WTF @ The Image Awards

You Sent It // WTF @ The Image Awards

Fresh, I wasn’t gonna post this foolywang on my blog, until I saw Eva . . . Lawd wipe me down puhlease!

Lance Gross (yes thats his last name) and Eva Pigford. Why is this child wearing a wig that looks like she should be writing novels, lathering herself w/ jojoba oils and reciting lines like “what happens to a raisin in the sun” and “still I rise”!?

You’ll never guess who this is…

It’s Corbin Bleu!! He looks different w/o all of that curly hair. He looks like he should be serving tacos, burritos and oranges.

- – Afro Jamaicano

Naughty Church Clerk

Naughty Church Clerk

It is possible to slay hoes while simultaneously being casket sharp? Leave it up to Verdine White to defy all of the laws! Wow, a Crunk + Disorderly first.

Shout out to son who accompanied V Dubb to Clive’s party. It’s not easy to step out with someone who is constantly upstaging hoes all of the time. Your Dr. Bobby “Sugar Biscuit’ Jones inspired suit from S&K Menswear is working for you.

Toss Him In Boss

Toss Him In Boss

I don’t have a clue as to who this fool is [let's just call him Tony for now] but he has garnered his own roped off section at the Freshdre Leon Talley Funeral Home. If this is what the talent looked like at the Southern Entertainment Awards no wonder Kia Shine was in the building cranking that Bynum.

Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids. This guy actually wants us to think that tomfoolery is real? Right. Trick Daddy said it best, that shit is foogazi. Where is Uncle Murda when you need him?

Moldy Raisinette

Moldy Raisinette

Janice must have spotted one of those damn ads for American Apparel when she was logging on to her myspace account and said “I got’s to get me one of those onesies!” Mama Combs, Mama Combs. WHY? To her credit she still knocks em dead when she steps out her front door, just in her own little tacky way. But don’t tell her I said that.

Casket Toss

Casket Toss

Anything Veronica Webb said on her little show on Bravo is now null and void. Excuse my French but what would the fuck I look like taking fashion advice from somebody with a string of dinosaur eggs around their neck?

Meanwhile, Luenelle is living proof that some Black folks in Hollywood will show up at the opening of a box of cereal just to get a photo op. Not to mention her outfit is making my thighs chafe. Pass the baby powder pon de left hand side. Read what Beatniks Celebrity Gossip has to say about that tragedy.

Who looked more dressed for a closed casket funeral?

Follow That FUPA

Follow That FUPA

Are those . . . nipples?! Jesus be a pair of Blue Blockers.

You guys are totally my eyes [unfortunately] and ears! I would’ve missed out on Ashford & Simpson’s hot FUPA action if it weren’t for your emails. I owe you one.

The couple performed at the 24th Atlanta Mayor’s Masked Ball to Benefit the United Negro College Fund in Atlanta over the weekend. If this didn’t make people break out their checkbooks then damn it I don’t know what could’ve.

Believe it or not they weren’t the only piece of hot ass in the building.

Freddy mutha-mc-lovin’ Jackson

Star-Spangled Fug

Star-Spangled Fug

A couple of nights ago I saw Deelishis of ‘Flavor of Love’ fame [yes, I'm making quotation marks with my fingers] on the cover of some men’s magazine showing off her booty meat, talking about a tribute to the soldiers. Excuse me but Khia is what the G.I.’s need to be getting a glimpse of while laying in their bunks!

The weed plant, the bottle of Hynotiq, the heavy Chevy sitting on them thangs . . . I don’t know where to begin.

[Thanks Keelo]

Dude, Where’s My Tights?

Dude, Where’s My Tights?

First those damn prom pictures now this. I don’t know what is more disturbing, the Moet bucket on the floor [I could use that to put some potted plants in] or almost getting a flash Shi Shi’s coochie. Nelly couldn’t hook his old lady’s little sister up with a pair of Apple Bottoms?

[Flicks via ONTD // Thanks PK]

How Many Squirrels Must Die For You To Look Fly?

How Many Squirrels Must Die For You To Look Fly?

Again, where’s PETA when you need them?

It’s been a second since the undertaker has come to make a visit but at last we meet again. I had to do a double take at my television screen on Wednesday night when I saw Keyshia Cole on 106 & Park dressed like a pimp version of Barnie Rubble. KeyLoLo’s stylist must be taking the week off to observe the Fuck Effort holiday because there cannot be another explanation for this shit.

If you covered yourself in rubber cement and rolled around in the lions den at the zoo this would be the end result. You know Neffe’nem is to blame for this tragedy. I can hear her ass now talking about “yeah girl that’s sharp right there!”

Crank That Fuck Effort

Crank That Fuck Effort

On Friday my mother-in-law Diana Ross gave a special performance at the Tiffany & Company 2008 Blue Book Collection Launch.

This brings a new meaning to the whole *DEAD* joke. She must’ve stumbled across a caboodle full of Fashion Fair from the 80’s and decided to put it to good use. Frankie says relax, Lady Di. The only thing missing from your face is formaldehyde. Jesus be a baby wipe.